(Source: lalalaide)

I smile so offten only to keep myself from crying every second that I breathe

I laugh loudly only so that the world won’t hear my agonizing screams 

I claim I don’t care so that no one will know how things really affect me 

I built a facade of this person that’s unbreakable, when I’m more delicate than china 

I know that at anytime I can explode like a shaken bottle of champagne 

I’ve learned that, alcohol , sex, nor drugs can relieve my pain

I’d rather see others smile than even see myself grin

If anything in this world unselfishness is my greatest sin

I wish thats somewhere there was an once of genuine happiness within

I can never seem to really express myself to people because it makes me feel weak

But the more I seem to hold everything in the less my heart will learn to speak. 

(Source: lalalaide)

  wooot woooot woooot 

I don’t even get mad anymore, I just stop and realize they can’t help their ignorance and stupidity. 

I just have this empty hollow feeling, like my soul is outside my body. I feel numb to everything around me. The numbness get worse when I’m under the influence of something, but once  my high is gone I’m reminded how it feels to feel. I can’t even remember what it really feels like to be happy, and be content with life, I guess that’s because what I thought was happiness really wasn’t. Or maybe it’s me being eager to have what I don’t deserve yet.

But who doesn’t deserve to be happy?